Grandpa’s Lessons

I was always quite fascinated by my maternal grandfather, Angus T. Lochhead, Jr.  I often think of his great smile and enthusiastic nature.  He had so many different hobbies and interests, like skiing, speed skating, cycling, camping, stargazing, origami, and leather-working, to name a few. He made granola, strawberry preserves, and whole wheat bread. Grandpa was in the vanilla business and delighted us with his hand-cranked ice cream as he tried out various blends of vanilla extracts.   He played the bagpipes and could whistle through his teeth.

 To me, Angus was a devoted grandfather who loved to be with his grandkids.  He always taught us something, like how to build a campfire or a reflector oven, how to ice skate, how to roast peanuts, or where to look for the constellations in the night sky.  He read us stories like Uncle Wiggly, Wee Gillis, and The Hole Book.

Grandpa surprised me one spring morning by coming to our house before I went to school. I was riding a bike with training wheels, but Grandpa announced that he was going to teach me how to ride without training wheels.  I was excited but really scared!  I can still see the scene in my mind as he ran up and down the street with me, holding onto the seat of my bike.  All of a sudden, I realized he had let go and I was riding solo—and I got scared and landed on the pavement.  Through tears, as I held my skinned knees, I told him I wanted to go home.  But Grandpa had no intention of letting me quit and made me get right back on the bike.  Startled by his response, and realizing failure wasn’t an option, I dutifully got back on and tried again.  After a few more tries I got it!  I was so proud to be able to ride my bike back home all by myself, just in time to go to school.

Grandpa loved me enough to teach me not to give up when things seem scary or hard.  Getting back on that bike after a big fall was hard.  Other times, on the ice rink, he had me get up and skate again and again after my many falls, even though I was cold and tired and my ankles hurt.  He had confidence in me.  When I was a young teenager he took me with him to a small town in southern Illinois on a speaking assignment for our church.  Partway there he announced that I would be his companion speaker.  I was horrified!  I had nothing prepared.  He told me all I needed to do was to tell a scripture story and share my feelings about Jesus and His gospel.  Again, I knew he was serious and that I couldn’t get out of it.  So I timidly addressed the small congregation and learned a great lesson—that when we do our best, God will help us do the rest.  My self–confidence and my love for God grew even stronger that day, thanks to my grandfather’s tutoring. 

Grandpa died when I was thirteen.  He was only 57 years old— nearly the same age I am today.   Looking back, I marvel at all he taught me, as well as my siblings and cousins.  He was a deliberate teacher, and I knew he loved me. I have such happy memories of him and wish my husband and children could have known him.  Someday they’ll get to meet him in heaven, and it will be a great event. I look forward to thanking him for being such an exceptional grandfather.  Until then, I can show my gratitude by trying to be the best grandmother I can be.  

Becky

A Choice That Blessed Generations

Each generation influences those that follow.  I’m grateful for the choices of my grandparents that have made such a difference in my life.  One significant choice was made by my grandfather, Roy W. Oscarson, during the Great Depression. I love his personal account of this experience, which set the course for his posterity.  Grandpa passed away nearly 20 years ago, but his influence continues to bless our family.

At the time this story begins, my grandparents were a young married couple with an infant son, living in Salt Lake City. 

 He begins: “The summer of 1932 was the "bottom of the pit" as far as our economic life was concerned.  We had failed in the business venture we had dreamed would be our life's income.  We were left personally over $3,000 in debt and the best job I had been able to get was as an extra salesman at a shoe store... Not able to support a family on these meager earnings, the first move was to send Vera and the baby to Idaho [to live with her parents, the Browns] where they would get proper nourishment…. I recall how despondent and lonesome I was living by myself.”

A regional supervisor came to visit the store where Grandpa was working. When asked if he planned to stay with the company, Grandpa replied that he would like to but could not support his family on a part-time salary.  The regional manager told him that if he could get to Seattle by August 27, he could have a full time position at a new store that was opening there.  Grandpa said, “I’ll be there.” His parents drove him to Idaho to see his wife and baby before he hitchhiked to Seattle.

Grandpa continues: “I had $10 in cash.  Mother Brown, feeling I may be in need of more, loaned me $5 more, insisting I pin it to my underwear in case I fell among thieves. At the outskirts of Burley [Idaho], Vera and the families patiently watched from the car until I was picked up….”

The hitchhiking trip was difficult, slow, and sometimes threatening. He felt he was Divinely spared during this journey. He made it as far as Portland, where he bought a bus ticket in order to make it to Seattle by 7:00 the next morning, Saturday. When he arrived, he hurriedly rented a room for $2.50 a week.

Grandpa found the store where he was to have a job, but to his dismay they told him they had all the employees they needed.  The regional manager had apparently forgotten his promise!  Grandpa was allowed to work that day. He did well, so they paid him a day’s wages and told him he could come in again on Monday and work as an extra.

Grandpa was devastated by this turn of events. He wrote: “What a blow! A thousand miles from home but no better off than an extra in Salt Lake.  I had no choice so I decided to run stock, trim windows and anything I could, and hope. …Disheartened, I dragged myself back to my humble room.  Exhausted, I took off my coat and lay down on the bed. 

What happened next is indicative of Grandpa’s faith and commitment to God that would become the hallmark of his life.  He wrote:  “The next thing I knew, I heard the sound of a trumpet and drum.  I jumped up and looked out of my window down onto Pike Street where I saw a Salvation Army group on their way to a corner where they would perform.  All of a sudden I realized it was Sunday morning.  I got my bearings, washed, shaved, put on my other clean shirt and looked for the address of the (Mormon) Church.”

Grandpa concluded his account of this experience:

 “This was to become a landmark situation.  A strange city, alone, blue, disappointed, but then and in dozens of moves later our first thought was to seek out the Church.  The decision to strike out for a job and to make the Church our anchor were good decisions in what was the real beginning of our married lives.”

My grandfather’s decision to go to church that morning in 1932 set a pattern that has blessed his posterity.  He and Grandma, who later joined him in Seattle, moved dozens of times and were examples of Christian service wherever they lived. Although Grandpa eventually became a successful businessman, his first priorities were always service to God and family.  He was a man of great faith and action, who spent as much time in serving others as in developing his career. He impacted thousands of lives through his leadership in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.  I love him and am eternally indebted to him and to my grandmother for their examples, teachings, and love.

Throughout our own family’s moves to several U.S. cities, we too have been blessed by making Jesus Christ our anchor as we navigate the seas of life. I've come to know that God loves me and that I have a purpose in this world.  Going to church with our family each Sunday and serving others each day brings peace to our lives.  It strengthens the love in our home and family and helps us focus on what’s most important in this world—finding true happiness through devotion to God and service to our fellow man.

Becky

Running the Home with Love

I've spent a lot of time around my parents. For the past two years or so just the three of us lived together at home while I was commuting to school. They love each other immensely. They have had short lived disagreements of course but they are forgiving, and want each other to be happy. My Dad buys my Mother flowers at least once a month. He tells her he loves her at least twice a day. It seems like at least daily he crafts a humorous sentence that communicates to my Mother in resplendence the magnitude of his love for her. At the dinner table we almost always began our meal with witnessing my Father verbally note what he has called the unmatched beauty of our Mother. She would always beam back at him with a big smile and a look of love.

The effect my parents’ relationship has had on me is undoubtedly positive. Sometimes when I was around my parents and didn't know what to say or had doubts about my day or life, my Dad would express his love for my Mom in some funny way, we would all laugh, and my cares would be booted out of the house for a while. That expression of love always made the whole family smile, and allowed us to all get along it seemed. My Dad knew how to create that atmosphere of love within the home because he prays every day and asks Heavenly Father to help him know how to show our Mother he loves her. I have never doubted that my Father loves my Mother a whole lot, and I know their relationship allows us to have peace in our home, and allows us to feel safe there.

The know-how and motivation required to work at and succeed at such a wonderful spousal relationship like the one my parents share comes from the restored gospel of Jesus Christ. Through prayer we can ask God our Heavenly Father for help and receive things like inspiration, courage and a willing heart which enables us to better love and sacrifice for our spouses. Through prayer and because of Christ's Atonement, we can receive forgiveness from sin and help in turning towards good habits and behaviors.

This knowledge of the restored gospel and the example of my parents’ relationship helps me feel assured that with the help of Christ’s Atonement, my future spouse and I can succeed at marriage, and have incredible happiness with our family that can last through eternity.
To learn more about the Atonement of Jesus Christ and what it can do for all of our lives, visit lds.org.

Evan

Choose Laughter

Recently I stood in the doorway watching my grandparents as they left the house. They walked to their car, holding hands, shuffling along.  When they reached the car, my grandpa opened the door for my grandma.  I couldn't hear what they were talking about but I could see my grandpa speak and my grandma laugh.  My heart swelled. I loved them immensely.  I felt as if I could feel the strength of their marriage fortifying my life. For years they had loved each other, laughed together and probably cried together at times. I wanted so much to grow old with my husband like they did and lean on him and laugh with him. I loved the optimism, happiness and dedication that exuded from their relationship.

Their attitude and relationship reminded me of Philippians 4:8 – “Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”

Our Father in Heaven asks us to find the positive, pure, trustworthy, honest elements of our companion, and dwell on them. He wants us to find the good and lovely and true parts of life and cherish them. My grandparents made finding the good their quest.

My mom once watched my grandparents walking together, holding arms and laughing. When asked why they were laughing, my grandma responded “if we weren't laughing, we’d be crying. “

I hope I will always remember my grandparents laughing together as they walked out to their car and remember to choose and cherish the sweet parts of life and marriage.

Katharine

Having Children Enriches Your Life

My friend and her husband are featured in this video. So inspiring to me are their thoughts about having children. They are the first couple with two boys. Hope you enjoy it as well! 

Katharine

Walking Where They Walked

Growing up, I learned to love my Swedish heritage through the stories my mother told me.  Every Lucia Day celebrated, saffron bun baked, and folk song sung meant something to her, and in time, to her children.  There was always a charmed feeling about that far-away country that I longed to know more about.

Fast forward to my college years – my opportunity to see Sweden first-hand arrives.  For three glorious summer months, I immersed myself in the language, culture, and history of the country I’d grown up loving from afar.  It was a magical time.  Suddenly, everything my parents and grandparents had shared with me about my family’s history came vibrantly to life.  I walked where my ancestors had walked, and it changed the way I thought about them.

The most touching part of this experience was its final week, when my mother came to pick me up.  Together, we enjoyed Stockholm, the beautiful city where she had spent her high school years.  We traveled south to the home of my mother’s family.  We stopped by the church they attended; we walked through the forest where my great-great-great grandfather worked as forest keeper, and saw the little red house where he raised his family.

Looking out at the pristine blue lake where they did their washing, I pondered the difficult life my ancestors lived. I thought about the trials they must have experienced, struggling to provide for twelve children in a small cottage through bitter cold winters.  I found myself filled with a profound gratitude for the dedication, courage, and love for each other that pulled them through.   

Family history, or the study of one’s past, used to be an unfamiliar concept dealing with names and dates of people I knew little about.  That all changed for me when I lived where my ancestors lived, and saw what they saw.  Now I know why Sweden meant so much to my mom – it means that to me, too.

Julie

(You can learn more about your ancestors by checking out http://www.familysearch.org, a free service to help bring your family history to life).

Grace in our Family

From the time I was three to maybe when I was eight, my Mom would sing lullabies to me and my little sister at night once we were in our beds. She has a beautiful voice and would sing songs like Baby Boats a Silver Moon, Here Comes the Sandman, Lullaby and Goodnight, and the songs Stay Awake and Feed the Birds from Mary Poppins. There was a close association in our minds as children between our Mother and Mary Poppins. Never once did I think she was too busy for us. I always knew my Mother loved me, and always knew I could talk to her about things. She was heaven sent and made our lives as wonderful as she could.

No matter what I ever did, my Mom would never speak a harsh word. She would simply love us. That is not always an easy thing to do. I remember one time when I was about ten years old, I got home from school I started making a really loud sound like a goat/siren in ten second intervals just to see if I could get her to crack. I probably did it for an hour at the top of my lungs as I went about my business around the house.  For those that wonder:  Do children test their parents and try to push their buttons?  The clear answer is:  Yes.

After that hour had passed she decided to leave to run an errand. Before she left she looked at me with pleading eyes, wishing to leave on a good note, giving me a chance to stop and be a good boy. I decided to keep baying like a strange robot sheep on a loudspeaker, and she finally threw up her arms in frustration. As she quickly left, I could see tears in her eyes. I sensed she was disappointed in herself in addition to being frustrated with me. It seemed like she was disappointed for letting her frustration get the best of her.

I realized then how perfect my Mother had been to me throughout the years. She had tried with all her moral fiber to be like Jesus Christ, and follow the things she had been taught about parenting by her parents, schooling, and experience in the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. We are all human though, and everyone cracks. Her crack was the quiver of a needle on a seismometer with an otherwise perfect history of serenity, despite the tremors which would erupt around her often. I felt terrible for trying to pull down such a righteous character. She had truly made us the center of her world every day. She would cook amazing meals for us every night, make lunches for us, and even clean our rooms on occasion. In that moment I knew she was amazing, and there was no greater thing she or anyone could ever do than what Jesus Christ has taught us to do. The book of Matthew, chapter 5, verse 44 reads, “But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you…”

My Mother had been trying with all her might to do that with her children, and she had been very successful. She is still very successful at it, despite challenges. In the Book of Mormon, we are taught how we can receive the will and strength to follow the teachings of Jesus Christ, so we can have patience and love for our families and those around us. The book of Ether, chapter 12, verse 27 reads, “And if men come unto me I will show unto them their weakness. I give unto men weakness that they may be humble; and my grace is sufficient for all men that humble themselves before me; for if they humble themselves before me, and have faith in me, then will I make weak things become strong unto them.” I know we can use the Atonement of Jesus Christ to help us accomplish good in our families, and to allow love and concern and a feeling of closeness to abound within them, just like my Mother has consistently done for our family.

Evan